Friday, August 26, 2011

My dad is cooler than Billy Corgan

I was just reading about an internet scandal where (former rock star, current icky semi-celebrity) Billy Corgan trashed a transgender woman on Twitter, using hurtful language like "he/she" and, um, threatening to punch her in the face. I don't feel like recapping the whole thing here, but you can look it up. I was inspired to post a story from my childhood, where I first learned that transgender people existed, and where my dad really knocked it out of the park in the parenting department.

When I was 8 or so, my dad and I were at a festival, and I met a person who looked like a man to me, but was dressed like a woman, and had a female name. So I asked my dad about it when we were alone. He sat me down and explained that: Some people are born into bodies that aren't right for them. It's very difficult, and they choose to change their bodies with hormones and surgery. We should respect this choice. Some people don't understand, transpeople face a lot of discrimination that's similar to racism, and that's wrong. A transman is a man, a transwoman is a woman, and I should use the correct pronouns--the person I met should always be referred to as "she" and "her."

I just wanted to say, awesome job, Dad! This was a really important conversation in my development as a pretty okay human being, and I did my best to pass it on to other kids. I was so lucky to have parents who were openminded and liberal about social issues and identity politics, and it makes me sad that so many people didn't have that in their lives. Thanks Dad!



Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Terrible Cleaning Advice

If you are a compulsively tidy person, you may want to skip this one. I once tried to articulate a version of my cleaning philosophy to my younger sister, who is very neat, and she became agitated and had to leave the room. I've always been messy, and now I live with a darling man who is even messier than me, and sometimes our house is a disaster. But I have made some realizations recently that helped me a lot, and now, I will share them with you! For free, even. Again, if you are naturally neat, you should probably stop reading now.

 1) Give up on perfection. No, really. I've been reading about hoarding recently, and I was surprised to learn that hoarders almost universally self-identify as perfectionists. It seemed counter-intuitive at first, but really, it makes sense. One of the reasons hoarders let their house get so icky is that they feel like they can't start a project if they don't have time to finish it perfectly. And they never have time to finish it perfectly. Most of us do this, a little bit, and I certainly did. But then I discovered an amazing magic trick. If I only have time/willpower to do one thing, I do that one thing. If the stove and the counter both need cleaning, and you only bother to clean the counter, well, now the counter is clean.

2) Small cleaning makes big cleaning. Once I start with a small, easy task, I often see something else that needs doing, and complete that, and so on, in an awesome chain of semi-competence. And if the cleaning chain reaction doesn't happen, well, now the counter is clean.

3) Some things are naturally icky.  I know that most of us don't have full control over where we end up living, and there are financial issues and such here. But if you are naturally messy and lazy, try to avoid wall-to-wall carpeting. The only people who can keep carpet clean are type-A neatfreaks who find vacuuming satisfying instead of obscurely disturbing, and if you read this far, that's probably not you. Other things that are impossible to keep clean include: food processors, white couches, and fondue sets.

4) A little organization is better than none. I keep all my bank statements and stuff in the cardboard box our crock pot came in. I know, it's horrible, but I can't afford a filing cabinet, and now if I need some paperwork, I know it's somewhere in this 1-square-foot box, instead of somewhere in my scandalous house.

5) If you couldn't keep a houseplant alive three years ago, you can't now. I realize it's weird, but I am totally baffled by houseplants. Isn't the point of a house to keep you out of the plants? Having a plant in my house is like having a snake in the tub--it's great, but it belongs outside. If you're not a weirdo like me, and you want to get a bunch of plants all of a sudden, ask yourself this question: Do you actually like plants, or do you just want to be the kind of person who likes plants? If you are a messy person who has awesome houseplants, well, I salute you. 

6) Be realistic. If you're a really messy person, you're not going to turn into Martha Stewart (or more accurately, her army of maids) overnight. You can learn to not be so ridiculous, but it's a gradual process.

7) Caffeine. It's like a goddamn miracle.






Friday, August 12, 2011

Semi-new things, two new dollies!

 I've been making these neato hoodoo hands (above and below). I'm using a great template pattern by Stacey Mead that I got on Etsy: http://www.etsy.com/listing/62553218/eliza-pennyworths-glove-an-extreme?ref=sc_1 I can make one in an afternoon. I want to get some lavender sachets to put in.
 This is the beautiful Lulu. Lulu is an Aletheia vampire sculpt, made by NotDoll. She very much deserves her own photo shoot, but it's too hot to go anywhere, so she may have to wait for fall. She was a very sweet gift from a doll friend, who designed her whole look also.
 And this is Maud! Also from a doll friend, though I bought this one. She's a Bobobie Isabella in mint-green resin. She is a total cutie pie. She's wearing a Barbie shirt here, and a skirt I made.

So, I am not actually a waitress now, not quite, but I am a hostess in a busy restaurant in the French Quarter. Hooray for jobs! It's got its drawbacks, like anything, but I basically like it, and my coworkers are cool.